Fun With Forms
Conversation between me and the new RBC Optimum Points Card Representative in the hair product aisle of Shoppers Drug Mart. He is updating my account information.
RBC [looking at my drivers license]: Is this your current address?
ME: Yes.
RBC: How long have you been living there?
ME: Mmmm…about ten years.
RBC: Oh, do you own?
ME: Yes.
RBC [fishing]: Oh, so you have a mortgage. What do you pay a month?
ME: It’s really low. I paid down as quickly as I could. About $800.00 a month.
RBC: That IS low. What is your place of business?
ME: Oh, I’m self employed – I’m an artist.
RBC: How long have you been doing that?
ME: Mmmm…about 2o years.
RBC: Oh! Are you a painter? I used to paint.
ME: I paint a little, mostly I make textile-based sculpture.
RBC: Sounds complex. What’s your annual income?
ME: It’s negligible.
RBC: Oh. [scribbles furiously]
Guess they won’t be sending me any credit card applications.
On a different day, that exchange might have made me feel like crying. Today it made me laugh. I felt no embarrassment at all admitting my income was negligible after doing something for 20 years, though I’m sure it confused the hell out of the bank employee. Of course I didn’t feel the need to clarify that I had worked in arts admin for many years and that the self employed status was relatively new.
I wonder what kind of illegal things he imagined I did (or am doing) to be able to afford real estate as an artist sans income? 🙂
Yes, it’s true, I’ve profited from socks in the past. My intentions were good (and the profits were small).
Now is the time to come clean… It’s sock-related, I’ll bet.